Posted by: Lea | January 9, 2009

Principles For Successful Relationships

Relationships can sometimes seem pretty complicated for some people, while a few seem to manage relationships with ease. Relationships don’t have to be a challenge and if you’re one that feels relationships are challenging, perhaps these basic principles will help.

Three Principles for Successful Relationships

1. Self Love

Unless you are connected to your own heart, you will not be able to connect with another person’s heart. Love is a two-way process and for love to work, it needs two hearts that are open and able to feel love.

Without self love, anyone who reaches out to you will find there is nothing for them to connect to, because you will not be able to find any reference inside you that will make it possible for you to understand and deal with their emotions, unless you have already connected to your own heart center.

The most valuable gift you can bring to your romantic relationships is an honest and healthy relationship with yourself.

This means you have to take responsibility for your emotions and learn to fulfill your own needs. As you practice and develop this, your self-love will grow and help you to understand and heal your past hurts, making you feel more balanced in your life and you will find greater joy in the world around you. You will no longer need your partner to be your healer, savior or anything other than who they are. You will have your own sense of completeness inside yourself.

When you feel whole you will be able to approach your relationship from the perspective of what you can bring to it, instead of what you need to from it.

Self love is essential for any successful relationship. This  takes pressure off your partner and make you even more attractive and desirable to them.

2. Respect

Even though we claim that we love our partner more than anyone else, we often treat them in disrespectful ways, even more disrespectful than we treat other people who are close to us.

You disagree with their dreams by mocking and finding fault with them, and insist your partner to be realistic.

It’s important to develop respect for your partner and their journey by stepping back and allowing them to make their own discoveries and mistakes, while providing them with support and love.

Judgments and expectations of how they should behave or any attempts to manipulate their behavior tarnishes the sacredness of the journeys that you are both on.

Such behavior, prevents you from experiencing your state of love and joy.

Respect your partner by allowing them to go at their own pace and learn their own lessons without interference from you. Inspire them by your example, nothing more. You are together to love and support each other.

3. Freedom

We do not own our partners. It’s a mistake to think that controlling your partner will ease your sense of helplessness. Do not try to change the person you fell in love with. Focusing on changes you would like to see in them, distracts you from focusing on your own growth and transformation.

For a relationship to grow strong and endure, both partners must allow each other space to grow individually.



  1. Hi Lea,

    I really like this entry of yours…

    I am aware of the first one but I still need to work on that somehow… I’m on track but there are just some things that I’ve been doing lately that are not helping me much…
    The 2nd one however is something that I have lacked. This factor is something that I need to work out… Often, before, I expect my ex to grow more mature, be responsible, be more initiative… I mostly push him to… I forgot that it was suppose to be something he should work out/discover by himself. Now that we are apart, I can only wish him best for his growth…
    Right now, I am focusing on giving myself love because it something that I didn’t gave myself before, even for years.

    Like I have said before, thank you Lea, for being one of those people who awakened me to give myself love…
    I just hope you’ll continue more on sharing entries such as this one.

    Have a nice day… Take care 🙂


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