Posted by: Lea | September 25, 2008

Healthy Relationships

Your primary relationship is and always will be with yourself, whether you are in a relationship with someone else or not. No relationship can be successful unless you approach it from a soul perspective of self-responsibility, self love and self growth. Before you can hope to achieve a fulfilling relationship with another, you will need to be completely honest with yourself and accept responsibility for your own emotions, moods and attitudes. You will have to respect and be kind to yourself. Avoid self judgments that undermine you. You will also need to grant yourself the freedom to change, grow and shine.

Being single offers opportunities for self discovery and growth. It is often a necessary prelude to any kind of successful relationship. When you’re not involved in a romantic relationship, you are being given the opportunity to digest and to gain an understanding deep into your soul of all that you have learned from your previous partnerships.

If perhaps you feel that you have been overshadowed by your partners in the past, your time on our own offers you the opportunity to grow into your full personal power. Or perhaps you have been too controlling in your past relationships, you will be given time to reflect the price you have paid for this behavior. You will be encouraged to consider letting down some of your self defense barriers and opening your heart to a more trusting and flowing connection with a partner.

If you are desiring a partner, yet seem unable to attract one, remember that you are at your most attractive when you are in charge of your own emotions, when you radiate the inner peace that comes from self love and when you make others feel respected and free to express who they truly are. All relationship issues come back to the fact that no one can live your life for you. No one can feel your fear, experience your dark night of the soul, nor emerge with triumph, wisdom and humility into your true, divine self for you. No one can learn your lessons for you or love you on your behalf.

Others can love you and fill you with a wonderful sense of warmth and appreciation, but only you can give yourself the support that you require to keep yourself balanced and whole within yourself. This is how you will achieve the highest levels of happiness, which are peace, joy and love. Then you will be able to multiply these by sharing them with another soul on your mutual journeys of soul expansion.

The feelings of connection that you seek through your relationship with another, first starts through your connection with your own heart.



  1. What an excellent article, and so very well put.

    ~Best Wishes~

    searchingwithins last blog post..A Broken Heart

  2. Hi searchingwithin

    Its so nice to see you again and thank you for your nice comment. Have a great day!

  3. hi there 🙂

    I saw this article I think 2 days ago (I was about to leave a comment but there was an error and I couldn’t submit it) and I was caught by the message.

    I can relate to this article… I’m in a relationship… and well, I’ve been dependent for a long time to my boyfriend… We broke-up for 2 weeks, and it has been hard for me… I keep on denying the fact that I’m really hurting and I’m needing him. Each day passes, I feel the burden that I’ve lost a big part of my life.

    I’ve realized that I’ve been too dependent. All I want was to be loved by him, to be needed, to feel important to him… and it hurts me so much everytime that I don’t feel that (specially now that we’re back together and there are changes that I still need to understand and accept).

    It is really true that you have to love yourself first before anything else. At least when you get to be in a relationship, you are not half complete, but a whole person already… I thought that having someone to be with, will complete the gaps of you as a person… but that’s not the case. specially when that other half leaves you, you are left back from the start.

    Well you see, I guess I just need something or someone to tell me right on my face that I’ve been hard to myself for a long time, that it’s for my own good… or make that best.

    Thank you for this article. I have printed this out in a paper… just to remind myself that what I’ve been searching for, I can fill it by myself.


  4. Hello Tessa

    Yes, I discovered the problem with my catcha plugin and disabled it. I’m so glad you came back and resubmitted your comment. I apologize for your previous difficulty.

    It makes me feel good to hear you say this article is helping you. I can relate to what you are saying as I had to learn this life lesson too. I think many of us do. My wish is to inform and help.

    Thank you for your nice comment and for sharing. Have a great day filled with many blessings.

  5. Hi there Lea…

    I made an entry on my blog and I linked this article there. Click my name to view my entry 🙂

    Thanks for the share… this article helped me a lot ^__^

  6. Hi Tessa

    I’m so pleased that you found this article helpful. I read your post too, really good article. Many will be able to relate to your feelings. Thank you for sharing how helpful this post has been for you. I truly appreciate it.

    I wish you an abundance of happiness filled with many blessings.


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